Last Friday I heard, through the proverbial grapevine, that a couple of ladies (whom I had considered to be smart and friendly colleagues) had been saying how "lively" and "perky" I always was, even at 8:00 AM - and how it annoyed them! That hurt me. In fact, one of them had recently remarked, in what I had thought was a friendly, genuine conversation, "Nazli, you are always so happy". And I replied delightedly, "yes, I am so happy to be alive".Now, gentle readers, my life is no better than yours - believe me. I have my own share of hurt that have cut to the core, and sets of obstacles that constantly need to be overcome. However, I am happy, for example, for my eye sight, for the use of my arms and legs, for being able to breathe, for my basic brain functions, and for what I value most - I am so happy for love! So yes I am generally very happy and excited - even at 8:00 AM in the morning. I am not a morning person, mind you - but I am bloody happy to be alive - any morning.
These 2 women don't like me much because they think I am always "perky". At first I felt sad - then a few minutes later, I looked up "perky", and here are the synonyms: "lively", "vivacious", "playful", energetic". I'll take a dose of "perky" any time, thank you very much. Incidentally, the antonym is "lethargic". I'll pass thank you.But I have faced this issue before, people thinking that my friendly nature is to be eyed with suspicion because how could someone always be genuinely "perky". Well, certainly if the depth of my character is undermined due to my friendliness, there is nothing I am willing to sacrifice - except the company of such skeptics.
Ok - I am not hurt anymore - I woke up just as happy and excited. But coincidentally, I saw one of the ladies this morning at a coffee shop. Other than the mild "good morning", I had little to say because I certainly did not want to "annoy" her. But it felt odd, not to be "genuine" and bubbly. Suddenly an elderly gentleman walked in with a Manchester United" cap; I forgot my melancholy act and with the exuberance I felt inside, I greeted my fellow man and talked about the best team in the world! It was as though Life was reminding me to be exactly who I am, and not to cater to the doldrums of negative opinions. What a boost to feel like Life is on your side.
Here's to all you happy, perky people out there! Here's to the Giants for winning Superbowl 42 (Roman Numerals need not apply). And here's to the hilarious "what is love" Pepsi Max ad, and the unibrow Planters ad. Talk about perky ;-)
5 comments:
Naz, this post is me written all over !!
I have been subjected to such labels by many frens, aquaintances, collegues a lotta times. That made me subtle down my demeanor..but then I gradually learnt, if I am customizing myself to suit someone I dont really care about then I am not being me !
And I was back to the "perky" me that I have always been. Your whole post made me felt like i was seeing muself after a long long time. Thnx for this.
I'm linking you. Have a good day.
:)
You have covered lot of ground in this post. Secret of happiness can be discovered in so many little things in life. Positive Attitude certainly helps. You are right Grass isn’t greener on the other side.
Giants pulled of an Upset of the century. Great Job by them
Nice post well written……:)
Not a usual reaction from some who regard any enthusiasm or happiness in a cynical manner. I remember at work on a number of occasions being questioned as to what do you want simply because I asked as to their welfare? The response was your only friendly because you are seeking a favor of one type or another! Personally I find the ideas of Aristotle appealing given his enhanced definition of happiness; a virtuous life is a happy life, notwithstanding one accepts his argument are subjective and dependant upon the rather tortuous path of discerning the chief good among any number of alternatives.
Lots of non-perky people like to ruminate in their thoughts in the morning. Some people like to use the quiet morning hours to meditate on their *being* and contemplate on the tasks of the day ahead, the week ahead, the month ahead.
Aggressive cheerfulness is an attack against personal serenity.
Sometimes, too much bon ami in the morning can wear on a person's nerves. I don't think your co-worker's attitude toward your perkiness should be taken personally.
Your life situation may be completely differant than your co-worker, even though you're just sitting one cubicle away.
If they have problems at home, if they are being secretly bullied by a supervisor, if they are suffering from a chronic disease and live in pain, it can be difficult to muster the energy required to match your perky enthusiasm, especially before noon.
There's a difference between being polite and aggressively manic toward your co-workers.
thanks for these thoughtful comments everyone - i appreciate the perspective...
wishing you all a happy new year
Post a Comment